+Friar George Abram OFM Conv.

 REST IN PEACE:

This post is one of many tribute pages found on my blog created to honor significant family members, friends, and loved ones who have passed from this life to the next . . .

+ Friar George Abram, OFM Conv. (my dear confrere)

Date/place of birth: February 4, 1944, Ronzone, Northern Italy

Date/place of death: March 6, 2021, Ghana, West Africa

 

 

**Friar George was a victim of the COVID-19 virus during the Pandemic that swept the world beginning in early 2020.

– Eternal rest grant unto him, O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon them. May his soul and all the souls of the faithful departed, through the mercy of God, rest in peace. Amen.

Meeting a friend in Baltimore

 

Meeting a friend in Baltimore

This morning I got a call from a young man, someone who I would call a friend, and who I knew from my days as the Pastor of St. Wenceslaus, a wonderful "inner-city" parish in East Baltimore. My friend begged me to come and see him in the city because he said he'd been going through some very difficult times and he needed my "help."

Although my schedule was filled, and my time very limited, I decided to respond to his call and so in the early afternoon I took a "quick" drive into the city to see him. I made this decision to visit him somewhat reluctantly because to be honest, my friend has "issues," and sometimes interactions with him can be quite complicated.

He asked me to meet him in front of St. Wenceslaus, and as he said it, he told me how much he missed my presence there. Back in the day he would often come to Mass on Sundays at St. Wens, and in those days he would literally sit in the very last pew of the church-like the tax collector in the Jesus' Gospel parable of "the Pharisee and the Publican" (see Luke 18:9-14). Many times and on many a weekday afternoon, this friend of mine and I would sit together in the front parlor of the rectory of the church, and over coffee and a little something to eat, we would talk about life and the struggles and even the joys therein. I fondly remember those wonderful conversations!

This afternoon, as I drove up Ashland Avenue and arrived in front of the church, I saw him on the steps of that beautiful house of God. It was completely heartbreaking for me to see him when I caught sight of him: he was laying on the highest of those steps, close to the doors, and he was seemingly "passed out." It was as if being on those steps, his frail body hugging those doors, was a place of refuge and some kind of comfort for him. And I knew that entrance so well from my years of warmly greeting parishioners near those very doors. Today, anyone else who might have seen my friend like that may have assumed he was just another "homeless bum" and a "degenerate person." But I knew better! (I quickly snapped this photo of him, hoping I could show it to him at a later time and use it to talk to him about why he had ended up in such a way).

Truth be told, my friend is a heroin addict, and he's homeless and he has many "issues," but he is a human being and he's a real person with feelings and dreams, and he has genuine hopes for better tomorrows. This young man is actually a very good person with a most beautiful heart! I know him to be a person who cares for others, especially those who are suffering, and he, like most of us, wants this world to be a better place for all people.

I got out of my car and I went over to where he was resting on the steps of the church, and I asked him if he was okay. "Are you okay my brother?" I said to him, and then he opened his eyes and looked into mine and he broadly smiled, as if to say "thank you for being here my friend!"

He then looked and stared off into some distant place, and his eyes, changing in that instant to something hollow and sad, spoke loudly to me of some deep inner pain. He told me things haven't been too well for him lately. As I looked into his very tired face, and I observed how frail indeed he looked, I had no doubt he was sharing a great truth, and the reality of tremendous inner pain and struggle.

Among other very sad and unfortunate things, he told me about how just the previous night someone had aggressively approached him on the street, and as he was verbally assaulted and spit upon by that most unfriendly stranger, was told he should "just roll over and die."

Yes, my friend is a drug addict, but he doesn't want to be enslaved by the illness he has. I strongly believe he wants to be like any one of us who desire happiness and contentment in this life.

Think about this: We are quick to say drug addiction is an "illness" but aren't we less willing to treat it as such?

Would I walk into the hospital room of a friend or loved one who is dying of cancer and raise my fisted hand toward them and loudly scream at them saying "how dare you suffer with this illness?" Of course not!

Drug addiction is a very complicated illness, and those of us who have family and friends suffering with this disease certainly must be careful not to become "part of the problem." And often that is a difficult road to walk!

My friends, please don't harshly judge our sisters and brothers who struggle every day with the disease of substance abuse and addiction.

They are people too! They may even be members of our families and/or our own dear friends.

And frankly, none of us are perfect, and we are all sinners!

Please pray for my friend. He's really going through a difficult time during these days.

Thanks. Friar Timothy

COVID-19 Funeral Ministry

COVID-19 Funeral Ministry

For the past year and a half, I have been assigned to the three-parish 'Pastorate' of St Michael the Archangel, the Church of the Annunciation, and St Clement Mary Hofbauer, in the Archdiocese of Baltimore, Maryland, USA. Collaborating with a fantastic Pastorate staff, there are four of us who are Franciscan-friar-priests assigned to this ministry; I serve as the Pastor, one is a full-time Parochial Vicar, while the others are part-time and 'semi-retired' Pastoral Associates. These other wonderful priest-colleagues in ministry, ranging in age from 75 to 80, are each "old enough to be my father" and at the age of 57 I am the youngest of the crowd! I am also far younger than a religious sister on who is our Pastoral Associate, and two of our deacons who are both advanced in age. Normally on any given weekend we see about 1,500 parishioners who come through the doors of our three worship sites; we have both English and Spanish speaking parishioners. Usually, the sacramental and liturgical lives of our parishes keep us all busy!

Under normal circumstances and on a regular basis, our work within these faith communities requires us to minister to grieving and bereaving families; we typically have one or two funerals per week within our Pastorate. More recently the number of funerals has increased: we know some have died because of the COVID-19 pandemic, the reasons for the deaths of some others were not made known to us, but most were probably within the usual spectrum of funerals we would normally have. There is no doubt all our funeral these days have been terribly impacted by this awful pandemic. It has been very heartbreaking and difficult for everyone, but it is especially true for the bereaved who have been unable to give proper funerals and burials to those they have loved. I have experienced this very directly, and as a friar-priest and minister in the church, I cannot even begin to describe the emotional and spiritual pain these strange funeral encounters have caused me, and everyone so sadly affected!

In Baltimore, Maryland, on Thursday, March 12th of this year, and just a couple of days prior to the onslaught of changes to our lives forced by the COVID-19 pandemic, I officiated at what would be my last "normal" funeral. It seems strange to me now to characterize this funeral as "normal;" it was celebrated for a five-year-old boy named +Javier who had struggled for most of his life with some rare form of childhood cancer. Funerals offered for children are never "normal," or so I thought!

On the evening before +Javier's funeral Mass at St Michael, and as is customary, his distraught and grieving parents, his young sister, and numerous others were able to gather for many hours in a local funeral home, and it was crowded there. Family and friends were able to keep vigil for +Javier, they prayed together, they showed their respects, and they gathered closely as they shared great care and affection and offered consolation to all who loved +Javier and his family. Among the tears, there were warm, compassionate, and prolonged handshakes, there were many hugs and long sympathetic embraces, and there were many consoling words closely and quietly whispered into the ears of Javier's parents and loved ones. The next day there were lots of people in the church for +Javier's funeral: along with the many mourners, we had the usual musicians, a cantor and choir, our sacristan, a lector and altar servers, and the funeral director came with his usual entourage of support staff. It was a wonderful show of support for +Javier's grieving family, especially for his most bereaved mom and dad. After the Mass, we had a traditional and solemn funeral procession to the nearby cemetery; many cars followed in the motorcade behind the hearse as it somberly took Javier's mortal remains to his final resting place. And there in the cemetery, and as I recited the final prayers, those gathered huddled together and clutched each other tightly as together they shared the intensity of their grief. This was a "normal" funeral.

Almost overnight, the "normalcy" of funerals, and church services in general, changed for all of us. Because of the COVID-19 pandemic, and just a couple of days after +Javier's funeral, our state and local governments issued strict and unprecedented health guidelines; phrases like "social-distancing," "stay at home," and "shelter in place," concepts especially alien to church people, suddenly became "the norm." Many were already suggesting the use of facial masks, and it was mandated by the government that "social gatherings" be limited to less than ten people. In the blink of an eye, we were no longer able to have "normal" funerals as I had celebrated for +Javier just a few days earlier.

Yet phone calls from grieving families, and from the funeral directors who serve them did not stop, and the volume of calls even seemed to increase. We were going to have a lot of funerals. Very early in this crisis I consulted with the other friar-priests, the religious sister and the deacons with whom I work, and we decided that it was best for just about everyone to observe the "shelter-in-place" guidance as much as possible. Far more than for me personally, their senior ages, and each of their unique health issues would possibly put them at a greater risk for contracting the dreadful virus. They really needed to "shelter in place" so I volunteered to cover all funerals within the Pastorate for as long as necessary.

As I was starting to become accustomed to the new COVID-19 era way of conducting funerals, I began to learn that some of my own friends and acquaintances had also been infected. Most of them survived, but a few did not. And everyone had to deal with new and awkward funeral restrictions. This affected everyone: it made no difference if someone died because of complications due to COVID-19 or if they had passed-away from completely natural and "ordinary" causes. Now, no one would be able to receive the proper funeral respects usually afforded to the dead. These realities have heavily impacted my own emotions as I have proceeded to celebrate quite a few "COVID-19 season" funerals!

How strange it is to visit nearly completely empty funeral homes where the few who gather are required to maintain "social distances," and are not allowed to shake hands and/or to give sympathetic hugs to those who mourn. How strange it is when there are no "in person" opportunities to console grieving children, grandchildren, other family members, loved ones, and friends of the deceased. How strange it is to be a part of "live-streamed" funerals knowing most who are "attending" are those watching from at great distances where they need to remain "safe." How strange it is for me, and even outside of my wildest imaginations, to wear face masks while praying at grave sides! How strange it is when only a few can be present for those graveside prayers, and where sadly we need to say these orations practically shouted from afar.

But I live in hope! When life returns to some semblance of normalcy, we will be able to honor these beloved dead with memorial Masses in our churches. When that day comes, and as not too long ago I had done for +Javier and his family, we will be able to show these dearly departed the "normal" and proper respects they rightfully deserve, and for which their families and friends surely long.

In your kindness, and in these COVID-19 days, please pray for the repose of our recently deceased sisters and brothers +Javier (age 5), +Constance (age 94), +Marion (age 92), +Jose "Pepe" (age 50), +Elmer (age 88), +Margaret Mary (age 99), +Freddy (age 47), +Daniel (age 85), +Santo (age 92), +Lawrence (age 79), +Maria (age 55), +Patricia (age 74), +Salvatore (age 85), +Josephine (age 93), and +Antoinette (age 101). Please pray also for the consolation of their more than usually distraught families during these difficult days!

Friar Timothy

Easter Sunday 2020 COVID-19

My Sisters and Brothers:

Today we celebrate Easter Sunday of the Resurrection of the Lord!  On this day we usually gather in our parish churches and we celebrate this day of our salvation with great excitement and joy!  Today we typically dress in our most “Sunday-best” Easter attire and we meet others with warm embraces and greetings of happiness.  On Easter Sunday our churches are always lavishly decorated with vibrant flowers and colorful banners.  As we worship together on this day, we sing triumphant hymns of praise!  We burn incense and use their plumes of mysterious smoke in order to symbolically lift our community’s prayers to heaven!  Normally, and with enthusiasm and jubilant passion, we sing together the EASTER ALLELUIA!  In our homes, families and friends come together for celebrations, and we gather around our Easter tables for traditional and festive meals.  While we share lots of food, we also enjoy Easter sweets, and tons of chocolate!  

This Easter and unfortunately, we instead find ourselves in the middle of this strange coronavirus crisis.  Most of what we know to be “normal” in our lives has been put on hold.  Our celebration on this Easter Sunday, this most solemn day of our liturgical year, has taken on completely different forms.  Yet perhaps, at least from a spiritual growth perspective at this moment in our lives, we may be able to contemplate more deeply the experience of the disciples on Easter morning.

According to the Gospel of John proclaimed in today’s Mass, “Mary of Magdala went to the tomb early in the morning, while it was still dark, and she saw the stone removed from the tomb.”   Then, as recorded in the Gospel of Matthew, an angel proclaimed to her: “Do not be afraid! I know that you are seeking Jesus the crucified; he is not here, for he has been raised just as he said; come and see the place where he lay” (Matthew 28:6).  All the Gospels tell us that Mary, and the other women who were with her, then ran to report this news to Simon Peter, to “the other disciple whom Jesus loved,” and to the other disciples.  With these reports of the empty tomb, the disciples began to realize Jesus had likely risen from the dead!  But John’s Gospel also tells us: “they did not yet understand the Scripture that he had to rise from the dead” (John 20:9). 

It may be difficult for us to completely realize the depths of emotions experienced by Mary Magdala and the others when they discovered the empty tomb.  On the one hand, they had heard the preaching of Jesus about the Resurrection from the dead and many times they had considered Scriptures that promised what he taught.  They wanted to believe!  On the other hand, the tomb was empty, and it was possible the body had been stolen and their hopes would come to a complete end.  At that precise moment, there might have been a genuine collision between the promises and dreams of their faith, and the very stark reality of human disillusionment easily brought on by fears, doubts, and faithlessness.  This might be the type of “collision” many of us are feeling on this Easter Sunday as we are forced to “stay home,” at a time when our normal celebratory practices are put on hold, and when we find ourselves living with fears about what will happen next, and what tomorrow will bring.   But my friends, at this moment let’s not forget we are EASTER PEOPLE!  In fact, those disciples who discovered the empty tomb early on Easter morning used the experience as their reason to have faith.  What mattered for them at that moment was not precise teachings they had previously heard about the resurrection from the dead.  Instead, what was vital to their faith was in fact the very absence of Jesus’s body in the tomb.  Even though the tomb was empty, and they might have been caught between faith and fear, they chose a higher power that promised resurrection and new life.  They firmly believed Jesus had risen “just as he had said he would.”

On this Easter Sunday 2020, even thought our world seems to have been turned upside-down, let’s have the same confidence and hope as those disciples did very early on that first Easter.  The tomb is empty, but we believe Jesus has risen as he said would.  With such faith, the somberness of our Lenten coronavirus journey promises to be vanquished, and again New Life is promised to all of us.  My friends, let’s encourage each other with the message of our Easter faith, perhaps now and today more than ever! 

                                                                                                  
Praise God!  Friar Timothy

Lights on Christmas Trees, Aching Teeth, and a Young Man Named "Connor."

The Eve of the Feast of St. Nicholas

This evening, I went to Walmart to return a defective “pre-lighted” Christmas tree (which I purchased only yesterday).  When I had attempted to assemble it, I discovered about half of the tree’s lights didn’t work, which as you might imagine incredibly annoyed and frustrated me! 

Then, to my great disappointment, and when I returned the defective tree to the Walmart, I learned they didn’t have a comparable tree in stock to replace it (I even asked them to sell me the “floor model” as a replacement, but the store manager said that wasn’t allowable).  I walked out of the store feeling annoyed and defeated.  

Demoralized and disappointed, and as I walked back to my car, I happened to pass a young man who was walking through the parking lot, and who was literally crying “out loud.”  It was extremely obvious to me that he was in a state of great distress.  And it greatly disturbed me! 

At first, I simply walked right past him and headed toward my car.  Then, my conscience getting the best of me, I felt this great desire to go back and ask him if he was “okay.” At that point, I noticed he was holding in his hand one of those cardboard signs that said something like “Homeless and hungry, please help me.” 

Then, for a brief few moments, and because I invited him to do so, we sat together on a bench outside of the Walmart and we chatted together.

He told me he was crying because, for some reason, his teeth were causing him tremendous, unending, and excruciating pain.  He told me he had no one to help him, and that because of the “bad blood” he has had with family and former friends, he’s all alone and doesn’t know where to turn next, or where to get help.  He seemed at his “whits end.” 

I asked him how old he was and he told me he was twenty-four years old.

He asked me if I could “help” him, but I told him I didn’t have a lot of money, and/but against my better judgement, I gave him a few dollars.

Then I put my arm around his shoulder, and I looked him in the eye, and said “I don’t know you, or what your 'issues' are, but I promise you there is light at the end of the tunnel . . . please, my brother, don’t give up hope . . .  and please know that God loves you, and that many people out there want to help you, if only they could.”

I think he was actually very grateful for that very brief moment of “humanity” we shared together.  And then, before he stood and departed from me, he very genuinely thanked me very profusely.  And then I sadly watched as he moved away and disappeared back into the chaos of the Christmas parking lot rush. 

Suddenly, and from an existential perspective, my annoyance about the defective Christmas tree I had just returned to the Walmart seemed totally insignificant. 

Then, when I returned to my car and started to head out of the Walmart parking lot, I found myself crying like a baby . . .

I hope and pray he is okay . . .

My friends, please pray for Conner.

And so in the spirit of the Season, I feel compelled to share this encounter with you!

Happy Holidays!

Timothy

 
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"Riches and Things" –the Twenty-eighth Sunday in Ordinary Time–Year B

My Sisters and Brothers: 

The author of today’s first reading understood that “riches were nothing in comparison to God’s wisdom and prudence” (see Wisdom 7:7-11). In contrast, the “rich young man” in today’s Gospel was unable to give up his possessions and follow Jesus. Although he claimed a life-time of complete obedience to God’s Commandments, he learned even more was demanded of him! Therefore Jesus said to him: “You are lacking in one thing. Go, sell what you have, and give to the poor and you will have treasure in heaven; then come, follow me.” Unable to do as he had been challenged, the Gospel tells us the young man’s “face fell, and he went away sad, for he had many possessions” (see Mark 10:21-22). Perhaps these accounts can motivate us to reflect upon our own “riches,” and the “things” in our own lives for which we might place more worth than God and/or his people. 

Do these passages also give us reason to have negative attitudes towards, and to judge those “rich people” who seem to value their wealth more than they do spiritual things? I think not! Or instead, might they merely challenge us (weather we are rich or poor) to reflect upon those “things,” even non-material “things,” we might be tempted to value more than the obligations and responsibilities of our faith? And is it possible they can also inspire us to self-reflect on the values we place on “things,” and how they might therefore and in any way “control” us? 

Isn’t it true all of us probably have “needs” that aren’t really “needs” at all? While I don’t believe our God is offended when we enjoy some of the simple “pleasures of life” (indeed, it may seem such things may just keep us sane!), we may wish to reflect upon those more serious “things” which can become major obstacles to healthy, positive, and faith-filled lives. We may need to ask ourselves if there are “things” in our lives upon which we place great importance, but for which we really shouldn’t. And then we should ask ourselves if these “things” therefore somehow serve to hinder our relationships with God, and with other people within our faith community? Of course each one of us must evaluate those “things” in our lives that occupy the bulk of our attention. And if we determine these “things” (whether great or small) are more important than our relationships with God and others, then our faith tells us today we must get rid of them in order to follow the Lord. 

We may not have so many riches like the young man in the Gospel, but there may be “things” in our lives that prevent us from serving the Lord with our whole heart, mind and soul. Jesus tells us today to reject them in order to serve him completely. And in this way we too will understand there’s “nothing in comparison to God’s wisdom and prudence.” My friends, above all let’s have a desire for the “things of God,” and may we always and enthusiastically understand that by comparison the “riches” and the “things of this world,” count for very little, and/or perhaps for nothing at all! 

Praise God!   Friar Timothy

"Partnerships of Life and Love" –the Twenty-seventh Sunday in Ordinary Time–Year B

My Sisters and Brothers:

In today’s Gospel the Pharisees questioned Jesus about marriage.  They asked: “Is it lawful for a husband to divorce his wife?” And in response, Jesus offered what many may believe to have been a very strict teaching (see Mark 10:2-16).  It may even be difficult for us to understand this teaching, especially in our world today as it’s not uncommon to have family members and friends who’ve been married, and then divorced, and then remarried.  This may even be your own personal reality.  And so it must be true that many such people are good and holy, and even though they’ve experienced the pain and difficulties of broken relationships, they may have at last managed to find genuine and committed partnerships of life and love with their current spouses.  And so, why would anyone want to deny happiness to others?  Of course the church must uphold the dignity and indissolubility of authentic marriage bonds, but in our own day it may not be entirely wise to place inordinate emphasis on these seemingly harsh words about divorce (if in fact Jesus’ words were even meant to be “harsh”)!  Rather, wouldn’t it be better for us to focus on Jesus’ affirmation of the great dignity of marriages that have been successful, and not so much on condemning those that haven’t?

About marriage, church law states: “The matrimonial covenant, by which a man and a woman establish between themselves a partnership of the whole of life and which is ordered by its nature to the good of the spouses and the procreation and education of offspring, has been raised by Christ the Lord to the dignity of a sacrament between the baptized” (see Can. 1055 §1).  These wonderfully lofty words seem to sum-it-all-up!  But obviously I’m not married, and I’m an “outsider” when it comes to understanding all of the complexities of marriage.  But even so, like everyone else, I too can find encouragement when aware of the successes of those who marriages are strong.  And so, as I reflect on the words of Jesus, and the church’s teaching, it’s easy for me to understand how married couples have a special “sacramental” calling allowing them to model the type of love Jesus has for the community of the faithful, “the church!”

Can’t we say that by their fidelity to one another, spouses model for us how Jesus himself never abandons those who are faithful?  Don’t they show us how Jesus does not leave us when things get difficult?  Isn’t it true they show us how Jesus always remains faithful to us?  Is there no doubt they show us how Jesus doesn’t exchange his love for us for some other type of love?  Don’t they show us how Jesus enables us to be life-giving to others?  Isn’t it true they show us how Jesus loves us totally and completely!  And, all of this being said, isn’t it true most spouses who’ve been successful “partners of the whole of life” say it’s “a lot of work?”  But isn’t this actually the point when contemplating how such marriages model Jesus’ love for all of us (a type of love that even took him to the sacrifice of the cross)?  I think so!

And so, without judging or being “harsh,” let’s always pray with charity and mercy for those who have found themselves in difficult marriages.  But let’s be glad we have a “strict teaching” regarding the never-ending sanctity of love, especially as it’s found between “sacramentally” married spouses!  And so let’s rejoice in those successful marriages always understood as partnerships of life and love!  Let’s affirm those marriages where mutual commitment and fidelity has left no room for selfishness!  Let’s stand in awe of those marriages where spouses have great respect for each other’s uniqueness, individuality, and differences, but who still labor for “the good of each other!”  Let’s delight in those marriages where equality and mutual respect abound!  Let’s reverence those married couples who have brought children into the world, and who have raised and educated their families according to the way of the Gospel!  Let’s be grateful to those wives and husbands who’ve always remained faithful to the dignity of their sacramental bonds!  And may marriages that genuinely reflect Jesus’ love for the community of the faithful, “the church,” always bring joy to those who are married, and also to those who observe even from the “outside!”

And let’s never forget to thank, encourage, and champion those we love who’ve embraced the sacramental vocation of Christian marriage!  We’re so very grateful to you!    
                                                                                     
Praise God!  Friar Timothy